November 13, 2011

I'm Not in a Ditch Somewhere

It's been insane. I'd make excuses, but who cares? Work, the minis, sports, drying my hair...all of it has kept me away from the blog. So here's a recap of the last few weeks. Try not to pass out.

RIP Monogrammed Minivan
I am sad to report that I totaled the monogrammed minivan a week and a half ago. I was driving to pick up the boys from school and a University student pulled across several lanes of traffic and I slammed into him going 35 mph. He *was* driving a Camaro with a very bad attitude. I am sick about having to buy a car, we were 11 months away from not having a car payment. I have another 2 weeks with the rental (I cried, the adjustor extended the rental, le duh) and to figure out what I want to buy. Barf. In the meantime I'm rolling in a 2012 Explorer like a pimp. It's ridiculous and even Sister Veronica Anne calls it a "Nice ride!"

Birds and Bees
I gave the minis the very simple birds and bees talk. Ryan is going into middle school next year and there's no sense in telling him and not Jack. Those 2 don't keep secrets about anything, so I drove them both to Sonic, bought them Slushies and ruined thier lives with the information. When I was finished, I asked them what questions they had. Jack's question was "Could we get in a time machine, go back in time, and you never, ever tell me that?" I laughed so hard I cried. That night I asked them what they wanted for dinner. They yelled down the stairs to me, "NOT EGGS!" Boys, le sigh.

Guest Blogging
I was recently asked to guest blog for SunTrust Banks. I love them and was so excited to do it. Here's what I wrote.

There's more. FitGirl had a baby, Halloween came and went, I went to a Clemson football game. The minis are playing basketball...

But let's get down to brass tacks.

Cyclones Soccer
Remember this post? Yes, agreed to coach U14 co-ed soccer this fall. We finished the regular season 8-1 and the final game of the tournament was yesterday. I will say this about that Championship game (I absolutely postively coached that game wearing pigtails and the requisite lip gloss), in which the Cyclones defeated the Wolverines 2-0...

All I do is win.


Legally Fabulous said...

OMG if I could have been a fly on the wall of the birds and the bees talk. IF ONLY.

Melissa said...

I used to teach health, so I've given several girl classes the birds and bees talk and answered 27843978423 questions about it (extra fun when I was pregnant). My husband already told me that I will be the one giving Landon and any other children we have that talk when they're older. I have no problem with it and you are my hero for giving that talk. Your boys might be freaked out, but at least they know they can talk to you and you know you gave the right information to them and they didn't hear stupid stuff from their friends.

I'm sorry about the minivan :( Are you going to get a new van or some sort of SUV? My husband wants a minivan so badly, but I just can't do it. I want a big tank SUV

Kate said...

I gave "The talk" to my 6th and 1st grader at the same time. Well, I read them a book, to be honest. My son was shocked and looked at me and said, "TMI".

Holly said...

Oh geez - sorry about your van, but sure am glad you are okay! You should count your blessings by blogging more often so I can get my smile on {of course it's all about me}. What vehicles are you looking to buy?

BTW, I told my oldest {fourth grade} how the baby came out and I thought he was going. to. die. His reaction was priceless and I had to work really hard not to smile. Love your little guys' time machine comment!!!!

Crisscross Applesauce in First Grade

Shannon said...

you telling the minis about the birds and the bees = funniest story ever. i laughed out loud multiple times!

Kristen said...

Oh - if I could I would oay you to come and talk to my boys about this. I am dreading it - where to even begin?!?! Sorry about the Monogrammed Mini. So sad (and glad you are okay! How scary was THAT?!)

PaperCourt said...

Of course you won! And now I've followed your footsteps and I'm coaching 2nd grade boys basketball. I know NOTHING about basketball.

Jen said...

Great update!

I'm so sorry about your car.


Anonymous said...

Im so glad you are okay!

Birds and bees comment from your son- hilarious!

of course your are probably the most glam coach to ever grace a sports field! Go CG, Go!

Heather said...

Um, can I hire you to give "the talk" to our 8 yr old son when the time is right? More importantly, I am SO glad you are okay after your car accident!

Leslie said...

I'm sorry about your accident, but I'm glad you and your boys are okay.

That's hilarious about the birds and the bees talk, and congrats on a successful coaching season! You rock!

Wendy said...

You are awesome. That is all. (and glad you are safe and back!!!)

Joy said...

totaled mini-been there done that, it SUCKS big time. I have a big beast, gas sucker SUV and truthfully I love it, it's a Toyota Sequoia. I do feel a lot safer in it. had I been driving it when that stupid B who was eating and texting slammed into my rear end I am pretty sure the outcome would have been better.

Oh and when r u available for the talk? he is only 9 but I know the inevitable is coming soon.

Anonymous said...

First, I made my husband do the whole birds and bees thing with my son AND daughter (twins) and the first comment out of my son's mouth was "there's gotta be another way!" Kerry